Connect the Dots

"What do you really want to do?", I'll ask my coaching clients, and the response is almost as pre-programmed as the "just looking" most of us mutter to a retail sales person when asked, "how are you?"  The usual reply is something along the lines of, "Well I'm really good at x, y and z."   Not what I asked but while we're on the subject, who told you that you are really good at x, y and z?  Yourself, your boss, your brother, your spouse?  Think on it and I'll come back to this in a bit.

Try asking a child (that hasn't yet succumbed to parental/societal pressure) what they want to do, and they'll likely have several answers in the time it takes you to blink.  "Go swimming, ride bikes, eat chocolate, play with dolls/dinosaurs, etc" are just some of the replies I've heard from kids.  Interestingly enough, they seem to do all of them well.  I believe it's because they pour their time and energy into doing them well so that they can enjoy them more!  Our self esteem likely started out as high before we learned to argue for our limitations and then started doing what we thought we were supposed to do. 

Before someone told you this is "what you do well" or "this is what you should do", what is it you enjoyed doing?  Was it reading books or doing research? Do you groove on helping others solve complicated problems?  Is it  math, music, building, breaking or growing things that motivates you?  Doesn't matter but I suggest creating a list to see what they are as a means of seeing who you are.

Now that we have a list of things we like to do let's get back to what you're good at doing; the list you already have in the front of your brain.  Have you figured out how you learned you were good at them?  Don't sweat it if you don't know, but can you draw lines between what you like and what you do well?  In this sense, can you connect the dots in such a way that you create a visual of how your next career move might look?  If not, I encourage you to give a more honest look at your two lists to see what you might add or subtract to help complete your picture.

I'll leave you with this to consider.  Are you really good at the x, y and z things on your list or did you simply out-perform others who cared less about them than you do?   Imagine taking the things you're really good at and re-purposing them for doing things that you truly enjoy so that you enjoy the time you spend doing them more...vinny